The Slam: Slammables

Hell ( I think the title says it all)

by X_of_coins, In the heart tree





"Please catch me!"



Monsters rushing past

Grinning with open mouths

We are all spiraling down

To the same place

And only one of us is



Author's Note:

So... It's been one of those week... Weeks.... Month... It's been bla. I
wish I could take a year long nap! The nap of Kings or queens sounds
real nice. I'll be alright eventually. 

Anyway! What do you think. It's obviously not a finished product but I
need ideas on how finish it up. I was thinking more about the monsters
but I don't want to over do it and some better word choices. Unless you
all think it's fine. I over think some things and this could be one of



I overthink a lot of things, too. As you said, it still seems a little unfinished, and some description of the monsters could be interesting to hear. (Read? See? Idk) That said, I do like the starkness of using the same words multiple times and the shorter lines. It provides a kind of strange description within itself. 

critiqued by queenie_flower, hopefully memorable
Aug 5, 2017