The Slam: Slammables

concrete treasure, long lost

by tanya_trash

so now you know that the rain won't wash away
yesterday's feelings, even though it washed away
your favorite earring down the storm drain.
you watched it as it swam down the pavement river,
bumping curbs, catching on floating leaves
until it met its final resting place in the sewer.
and so it may forever float beneath walking feet,
forgotten among the other trash, buried deep
in the hollow coffin of concrete.
maybe sometimes you'll think about that earring,
such beauty among such garbage,
but you'll never get it back.
you let the still pouring rain splash your face,
hoping it will wash your conscience clear.

Slammings

I really enjoyed this piece. Thank you! My only criticism would be that saying the earring is floating, and in the next line, that it is buried in concrete, is confusing. I had to reread to figure out what you meant. Unless that was deliberate?

critiqued by Teresa
Jan 14, 2010